mizarchivist

So there I was, back at high school. Couldn't remember my locker combination for love or money and couldn't find where I'd written it down. I knew I'd not used the combination in a long time, but also that I'd had the same locker for long enough that I should remember. I had a whole bunch of stuff that really had to go into a locker, including QE's khuhris, which were wrapped up in a towel, but poorly done. I did at least have some help- one of my classmates, a guy I'd known since grade school and as always in homeroom (and therefore near my locker) said I could use his locker, which was open. It was sort of a tardis of a locker since it was much bigger on the inside and fit everything I had without a problem. It actually didn't separate my locker from his by several, and theoretically I could get a few things, although chances were I wouldn't be able to get that goddamned math book that I'd not looked at in way too long, and of course hadn't gone to class for a long time, and yes there was a test soon.
I would really like to have the capacity to short circuit these dreams more often. I think I've only done it once when I talked the teacher out of giving me the test when I explained I'd graduated over 10-15 years ago and I had NO idea why I was even there. That worked.
However, for anxiety dreams, it's at least familiar. The bits I don't remember from I think involve monsters, though. I'm certainly tired enough for there to have been monsters.

I just woke up from an exhausting anxiety dream about looking at real estate.  It was a pretty amazing house, huge. Had a lot of great features and at least 3 bathrooms and this interesting attic/loft area. But it was either possessed or cursed. The ivy in the front yard almost ate me when I left the house. We were also apparently directly next to the ocean, which was acting quite sinister (not that you could see evidence of the ocean when you were at the front of the house. Hello, dream logic (I did say cursed house, though). I'd not quite convinced the rest of the family to leave the house. The group included my father who was helping review the house, not planning o living there- some verisimilitude, as he'll arrive this morning for his visit. We had to get out of there before something like human sacrifice happened. All this while more and more other groups of people were there to see if they wanted it, too.  I think I'd rather be awake.

- Slept very poorly and had odd dreams about being in Stephen King axe murderer situations. I was resigned to it. Also dreamt about a friend's kids, but I know she doesn't have that many. I didn't know any of their names
+/- Alarm did go off, even though I was convinced it wouldn't. (So, kept waking up to check)
- Empty tank for heating oil
- Got cold fast
+ They already know it's an issue, we'd been on the rounds, but yesterday messed things up
+ Nobody's going to be horribly inconvenienced by this turn of events: I'm about to go to the gym, purple_terror 's still in the UK, and quiet_elegance  is not only an evening showerer but is still between jobs. Also because of the latter can be here to let the oil guy in.

So- not the way I wanted to start the day, but it's the best variation to the options.

ETA:  Hm. It looks like my disgruntled avatar has been commandeered by broken code. Better this one than my Ani/dork one. I suppose.

I had a very vivid dream about being laid off. I was there with all my coworkers and the chairman of the board. I was the first to go. I'm still feeling shaky.
There is no way this dream would come to pass as it has. I would not be the first librarian sacrificed- we have part-timers who don't keep whole programs running, after all.. So, yeah. Nevertheless, I'm feeling very twitchy.

Before waking this early morning, I had a visit from my dead father-in-law. He died when quiet_elegance was 16, so not someone I'd ever had a chance to meet. But here he was, in my kitchen- a presence similar to his son, but darker and a bit more compact. I was alone with him and talking to him in such a way that it's as if he was gone by choice rather than by cruel fate. I pulled everything I could from our food/bbq orgy this past weekend - partially because he seemed like he needed food and also as a concrete example of what his son enjoys doing and has a great proficiency at. Without remembering the exact words, I knew emphatically that he was pleased with q_e's work. He was very partial to the brisket.  FiL definitely had some choice words for MiL's choices in boyfriends, though. Didn't like, nosirreebob.

I'm not a spiritual person by most people's standards, but I do not ignore signs like this. It was absolutely a benediction. At least for q_e. :)

I am not very subtle on many levels. This early morning's dream featured a spreading zombie problem. They weren't fast moving, but they were dedicated to rooting out any living humans. I had to keep moving to keep from getting 'et. Also, I had missed the first week of school thus far, it was a school day somewhere in the second week and I was having a really hard time getting to campus. It felt like high school again. People kept arguing that I might as well just skip til Monday- (dreamtime being set at Thursday, I believe) so really wouldn't it just be easier that way? My mom was not writing me a note, I don't think- so arriving without even that much was going to cause a lot of trouble, but I really was determined. All the while: zombies.

Little wonder I'm feeling very twitchy and hoping to make more progress on teaching for Saturday. I have 8 students now, 4 of whom have written in response to my request to tell me who they are and what they want from this class. If I don't hear from at least 3 more by the end of the afternoon, I will likely call them.

What is getting me about this class is that much of it really does depend on the individual's experience using primary sources. "How do you find primary sources?" is a question. Well, that depends. What kind are you looking for? Where have you looked? How have you asked? Whom have you asked? How willing were you to go to the place to look at stuff? ... deep breath.... I'm SO nervous. I expect I'll never offer this class in this format again. The stress of knowing they're paying over 100 bucks to hear me talk. God. Definitely feeling like what I've got to say isn't worth that.  But, too late now. I have emailed all of them to indicate that I'm emphasizing collaboration. There's really so much to choose from-- :P more deep breaths. This, too, shall pass. I know I'll be OK. I can think pretty well on my feet and I still have 4 work days to overcompensate prepare.

What I remember about the dream

So, I think last night (this morning, really) was the first time I had a dream about Turbo-Jam. Not doing the workout, but hanging out with the crew.  Someone asked me who I thought was cutest, and they were expecting me to pick from just the boys, as if I didn't think that way about girls.  Um... Also, it felt like I was living in a video because I swear I could see everything go to still with text flashing up of who's who, like they have in the meet the team section. There were a few more guys to choose from in this case. I don't remember who I picked- I think someone who looked remarkably (exactly?) like Heroes' DL/Buffy's Forrest. The next bit of the dream involved me trying to catch a plane, but I have no idea where I was or where I was going. I had to get my stuff onto a shuttle, which looked like tethered golf carts or maybe a safari/open air set of attached cars. I was trying to call isabelluna on my cell phone to tell her if she didn't hurry, the shuttle would leave without her. Except true to form in all my dreams, I cannot operate technology. I punch numbers on any sort of phone and never get to the part I want or the number I need.  I think this may have been a first with trying to use a mobile. Usually it's a landline or a computer. Feh. So, I think I'm much more comfortable awake, thankyouverymuch.
Last night I made 6 more dragons. quiet_elegance donated some *awesome* marble-like things. Spheres of something or other that are totally gorgeous. There are only 2 and they are quite heavy- about a 1 1/2 inch diameter, I suspect with a nifty prismaticy/metallic sheen. Wee!! Our regular waitress at the Arlington Diner was pimping the work I brought in last Saturday, and it behooves me to bring it in again today now that they've been softened up to the idea of it all. We shall see. I have to start making decisions about who is getting what from my stuff for the holiday.
All of my co workers are coming over tomorrow for dinner, with assorted spousal units, if such apply. Um. crap. I totally don't have enough chairs. Does anyone have folding chairs I may borrow? I have 7, maybe 8, and need to get to 13. At least we are already getting a card table, which might stretch things out enough. Should be interesting. I'm doing the meat roasts and everyone else is bringing stuff.

The dream I had this morning: I was on a rollercoaster in vegas. Also, vegas was one very ugly hotel with crappy games that were not remotely interesting to play. Arisia has more fun games to play than this place.

As opposed to the real world... where blood is thicker than talent. quiet_elegance's job evaporates in 2 weeks. The boss is taking his son back to work for him, you see after son attempted to strike out on his own elsewhere. The usual requests re: carpenters & jobs.

EDIT: While I appreciate the offers of sympathy, I feel like I'm a cross between can in static storm who is without a dryer sheet and the proveribal falling bowl of petunias: "oh no. not again." What I most need right now are things to cheer me up: solutions, humor, or even stories of shared woe.

Last night I dreamt I was moving back to Athens, Ohio to go back to college. I even remember  remembering the look on my boss's face when she found out I was leaving that week- no notice (the boss part happening before the dream started). quiet_elegance and I didn't have anywhere to live, didn't have jobs, but maybe were signed up for classes. What's extra odd was that we were both going to a school here in Boston, but it didn't synch up with OU's schedule, so we were going to leave in the middle of classes in favor of new ones. Ugh.

All this was triggered from q_e talking about what he'd consider as a new profession once the wood working becomes to painful on his limbs. ... and eating pizza after class, I bet.

What I was struck by at the time of that actual conversation was that I have NO idea what I'd do if I wasn't an archivist. It could be that I found the precisely correct profession for me, but heaven forfend there ever be a reason why I couldn't continue with it. The only things I could think of that hold any interest for me would be a greater burden financially or requires the sort of training I'm willing to go through: artist, activist, shrinkologist.
Does the peanut gallery have any clever thoughts to add to this train of thought?